I just made this.
It's been crowling for a while.
everytime again I put it away thinking it's nothing
now that I wrote it down
I know I have to work on it
even though I haven't much choice do to something
I'll just have to follow reality
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allowed
I miss you
I know I'm not allowed
I know you don't miss me
not even in a different way
It's not that I still feel that way
it's just the possibility that I have
to feel it
but I'm noy allowed
I try to picture you
as real as just infront of my eyes
it's not hard
I try to picture you, you and me
I know I'm not allowed
I don't want to know that
But I will play by the rules
I will keep up forgetting
I said I wasn't sure yet
but I am
I'm not
but not because I can't
I told you a story
I told myself
but you don't know it
because I've never said it out loud
what bothers me
is that I find it a waste
that you said
It couldn't happen again
why? because of afterwards
well what if there wouldn't be an afterwards
what if it just stayed
and we wouldn't feel a thing
I think it's a waste
cause I thought it was nice
it was fun
but I know I'm not allowed
I imagen it would be the same
with someone else
someone with who I may
but I don't know
I hoped
I imagened
although I didn't wish
It would be allowed