I will stand back now
Just can’t stop being selfish
Don’t mean to be like this, so I’ll stop it
Although that’s not what I wish
I know I’m bothering people
Don’t try to tell me that’s not true
Just want to be happy
And to have a normal friendship with you two
That’s not possible if you know so much
Worrying about all the things I do
It’s taking a lot of your time
And I don’t want to be the one causing this to you
I’m not worth all your time
You have your own life to live too
I didn’t give you a change, but I am right now
So can you please just drop this issue?
You may ask me how I’m doing
I won’t tell you the whole truth anymore
Can’t do that to you, I won’t
Wanting to tell my feelings to you, that I’ll have to ignore
I’d only disappoint you again
If I let you see I’m not holding on
That I’m giving in once again
I’m really not that strong
But you won’t get to know that
‘cause I won’t tell
I’ll just put up my mask again
And say that I’m doing pretty well
There may come a time
You’ll know it is a lie
Because it will start to show
And you will wonder why
But that time hasn’t arrived
And I hope it never will
I want you to know me doing well, being strong
But my feelings will remain, inside still
Just want to be left alone this time
Want no one to worry about me anymore
So I’ll say I’m doing well
Hoping things will be as they were before
But just as you said
It’s time I start to think about what this is causing
To everybody else, and I did
This is my conclusion, I will not tell you another thing
Don’t want to be the one
Responsible for so much trouble or pain
Right now I am, so that’s going to change
And there nothing left to explain
So, from no one I will be that ‘happy’ girl again
At least I hope I can still pretend
Through doing this I hope that you all
Will get some time off, and still be my friend.
**Ik hoop dat jullie na dit gelezen te hebben kunnen begrijpen dat dit mijn laatste gedicht was als --justme--, omdat ik hier niet anoniem ben. En om nou om die reden de stoppen met gedichtenfreaks zou ik jammer vinden, daarom heb ik besloten een nieuwe naam aan te nemen. Ik hoop dat diegene dit ook begrijpt, en ook ziet dat dit beter is. Mocht iemand hier mijn gedichten willen blijven volgen kun je me altijd mailen, dan zal ik je mijn nieuwe naam geven.**